It’s hard to Breathe today.
It’s hard to breath when you know that someone you love is leaving or has left this life. It’s hard not to weep, it’s hard to not be filled with thoughts about everyone who She has touched in her life time. It’s hard not to think about how much you love her and how much she has blessed your life and how amazing you think her life has been in your eyes. Grandma Vela my grandma is about to leave her cursed body behind. I’m glad of this at least, it’s hard to see her struggle with the pain that is inflicting her hard to see her so bound by this body that is failing her that has stopped working.
Today I remember the fear in her eyes as I sat with her in her hospital bed, this past weekend and I remembered something she would say to me over and over again, “if it weren’t for Jesus Christ I would not have gotten through this life.” I never really saw her fear growing up, I know it was there though, and now I see more clearly how much Our Heavenly Father has been my Grandma’s help and courage when she has faced the hardest parts of this life. I can see Him now calling her home. Even now he as sent his angels to sing to her as she goes through this death. I love her my Grandma, and I will miss her. But I do not weep without hope that I will see her again in the next life!
Before I left the hospital on Sunday, I bent down and hugged her and kissed her, I whispered to her that I hoped and prayed she could go home soon. Part of me hoped and prayed that it might be her earthly home, but I see now that it was her heavenly home that I was hoping and praying for. She is going to be well soon!
Please pray for us my family as we walk through this and are even now waiting for her to leave, all her Children will be with her tomorrow I hope. I pray!